First off, we find out that Marmaduke, aka “Moose,” is Jughead’s roommate.

The gang at Pops
(Photo: Colin Bentley/The CW)

Archie is still trying to make a community center at the boxing club. Archie and Veronica decide to raise money by holding a car wash. They bring in a whopping $400, which is quite disheartening.

Betty and Charles listen in on a phone call after sending an FBI agent pizza delivery man into the motel where the cult is staying. They hear gunshots, and someone gets on the walkie talkie to tell Charles he shouldn’t have tried to fool them.

Nana Rose screams like a woman half her age. Cheryl and Toni hop out of bed running. Nana calls Cheryl Penelope and says she thought she saw triplets burning in the fire…?

Jughead’s teacher says, “All good writing has one thing in common. Authenticity.” The teacher assigns work requesting each student to write a final chapter to a mystery novel. Of course, Bret chooses to antagonize him the entire time they are in the library writing. Jughead scares the crap out of him with some anger and wit. “Why don’t you try writing a compelling drama instead of starting it?” Ha-ha! Way to go, Jughead, such a great line.

A situation diffused

Betty’s mom and sister Polly are still in danger thanks to cult leader Edgar and the “farmies.” When Betty and Charlie do not provide Edgar’s demand, he sends Polly to the station. She is a walking bomb. With devices strapped all around her torso. Somehow under pressure, Betty figures out how to override the kill switch with a bobby pin.

Malcom, Mad Dog’s little brother, gets jumped by some thugs from the local arcade. Mad Dog and Archie have a conversation about how they should not retaliate.

Betty gets Veronica to give her tons of money via some shiny Faberge eggs. She steals a bus and gets fake passports thanks to her connection with Toni. Foolish Betty then drives the bus full of all Edgar’s demands and drives to the abandoned motel where the “farmies” are staying. Then she gets bashed in the back of the head.

Ooohhhh I smell a rat

Archie, in disguise with a hoodie and bandana, goes after the thugs who beat up Malcolm and steals their dirty money. He says they can use it to build the community center. Mad Dog tells him dirty money cannot be spent and asks if Veronica can help clean it.

Betty wakes up in a motel room with her mother. They escape the ropes on their hands and feet, and then attempt to flee the courtyard.

Toni hires Darius, the mystery night nurse, to help with Nana and the twins. The next day, Cheryl fires Darius after he says Thistlehouse has rats. She says he is the rat because she thinks he moved her dead brother, who she had propped up to appear as though he is sitting in a chair in the Blossom Chapel.

Evel Knievel, aka farm cult leader Edgar, got shot next to his rocket. Betty’s mom shot him as he was walking towards her and he reached for his own gun. Seriously, he was wearing an all-white flight suit with American red, white, and blue stripes and stars.

Archie’s mom decides to stay in Riverdale and tells Archie she will help get the community center established as a 501(c)3 so he can take donations and get the center up off the ground.

Toni walks in on Cheryl sewing up her dead brother after she found a rat gnawing on him. Gew.

The identity of Marmaduke really being Moose gets out, and he feels his life is ruined since his father was the Gargoyle King and his sister was killed by the Black Hood.

Famous last words

Veronia Lodge. No. Veronica Gomez. Negative. Veronia Luca. Ding ding ding. 

The episode ends with a knock on the door at Jughead’s where he and Betty then find an old VHS tape that says “Famous Last Words.”