One of the best things about The CW is that they make their shows available to stream online. This comes in quite handy when you find yourself getting hit down hard by the flu. Yesterday I caught up on Riverdale and Nancy Drew so I could cover the recaps for all of you. My apologies for the delay.

Jughead’s narration opens the episode, which gives me hope that our Juggie is not dead, but that this is all part of the story he has been ghostwriting. What does he say from beyond the grave? 

“Well, it finally happened. The moment we’ve all been waiting for. A fire in the woods. Three friends in their underwear, covered in blood. My iconic beanie up in smoke.”

What happened? Where are your clothes?

Archie, Veronica, and Betty leave the Stonewall Prep party and head to their homes in just their underwear. They each have different excuses when their parents question what happened. Of course, all three of them lied and one of their lies was terrible. Archie says he went skinny dipping and preppies stole his clothes. Veronica says she lost her clothes after losing in strip poker. Betty stumbles through a lie about Bret spilling an entire bottle of red wine all over her. The worst liar of them all was Betty, probably because she has no idea what really happened after she woke up with a bloody rock in her hand and a boyfriend with his head bashed in, dead. 

As viewers, we do not know what happened either. We do know that Betty, in her right mind, would not kill Jughead. Her brother Charles helps them hide Jughead’s body and burn their bloody clothes. Then he attempts to find out what Betty is forgetting with some sort of hypnosis. She then remembers Donna blowing a white powder in her face and then the world going dark. Charles claims to immediately know what the powder is, something called Devil’s Breath, and that when inhaled it will make a person blackout. He also says that Betty would have been in no shape to kill anyone after being drugged.

Archie’s Mom is in love

Archie finds his Mom in the kitchen with her friend Brooke Rivers from the Naval Academy. His Mom has filled her in on his college dilemma and Counselor Rivers says that she would be willing to recommend Archie to the Commandant for the Naval Academy. The exchange seemed odd and Archie said he couldn’t join them for tea, because he wanted to go for a run. Although we know he isn’t going for a run, he’s going to scare Bret into possible incriminating himself, because Betty put a bug in Bret’s room. 

When Archie returns home his Mom wants to talk. She comes straight out with a doozy of a confession, saying that she doesn’t want there to be secrets between them. “Brooke’s not just my friend. She’s my girlfriend.” Archie asks for clarification, possibly thinking that he didn’t hear her right and so she explains that she and Brooke hadn’t been close since college, but reconnected after her husband died in Afghanistan. Ms. Andrews says, “I just thought I was comforting her, and then I don’t know…it just happened.” No surprise here when Archie is supportive. I mean, why wouldn’t he be? His parents have been divorced and he’s not a judgy person. Good job, Archie.

With the confessions coming out, Archie almost tells his Mom the truth about Jughead. Then he gets a call from creepy Betty who is staring at him from across the street. Somehow she knew he would want to come clean and she is telling him to stop talking. So weird. So instead, Archie divulges that Veronica is struggling because her Dad is very sick. Makes sense. Then he goes to meet Veronica at the bar and they drink. Because that’s what teenagers do in this show. They make rash decisions, they lie to their parents and they drink hard liquor on a regular basis. 

Jellybean gets some air time

FP makes a visit to Betty’s house with accusations on his mind. He says that Jellybean gave him the idea to track Jughead’s phone since he has been missing for a full day. Where do you think the GPS coordinates pinged? Betty had Jughead’s phone in her jacket pocket. She stumbles through another terrible lie about how they left the phone charging before heading to the party. 

With Jughead now officially declared missing, there is a search through the woods where the party had been. A blood-covered rock was found. FP finds the need to let Betty in on this detail. She then asks Jellybean where she keeps the fake blood. Apparently, she has ample supply of the red goo and the next thing we see if Betty painting fake blood on a rock. Of course, she then calls Charles and they plot to steal the real rock from FP and replace it with this decoy. 

Stop listening to Charles

What I still don’t understand is why Charles is still helping. We know he is evil, we know his boyfriend is that crazy guy Chick who is in prison. Is Charles in on this plot with the Stonewall Prep students? He has so much dirt on Betty and her friends now, because they keep trusting him. I’m still not even convinced that he works for the FBI. No one is ever working with him; he’s always on his own. 

Of course, he does seem to know everything about serial killers. He does claim to be training Betty to be some sort of sick profiler and now she acts a bit more off than usual. He is also the person who explained why Betty passed out. “Devil’s breath is a potent drug that blocks certain neurotransmitters, affecting one’s short-term memory, much like a blackout.” He suggests that Donna put the rock in Betty’s hand and spun her around like a top.

The search party

Since the Stonewall Prep students seem to be one step ahead of Betty and her friends, she decides to throw a major curveball. She suggests that the police and all of their friends should head to the woods to form a search party. The community shouts for Jughead and when they get near to where they hid his body, Betty nudges Archie to let FP know that he found something. I have to say, I have some really close friends, but I don’t know that I’d let any of them push me around like Betty does. I am also confident that I would have called the police from the very beginning. This is why the show is all about teenagers and not almost 40-year-old women.

Betty wearing Jughead's jacketSo FP finds his son, dead, badly beaten. He and Betty go into the morgue together to ID the body, I guess, but they both already knew who they found so it was strange. Archie, I think, confesses something to his Mom. I don’t know what he says to her, but she gives him the opportunity and he pulls the curtains closed. It seems he is hiding from Betty, so hopefully, he is choosing to be responsible. 

Veronica and her prissy sister Hermosa go to their Dad and let them know they are willing to set their difference aside. They are doing this in lieu of him being very ill. He seems quite pleased with this development. 

The table is empty without Jughead

At the end of the show, we see Veronica, Betty, and Archie sitting at the diner. Betty explains that she knows Donna is scared. She, as the egotistical brat she is portraying these days, tells the crew that now all they have to do is wait for the preppies to make the next move. 

I’m still holding out hope that this is all for Jughead’s story and that it isn’t real. 

Watch again when the show comes back next Wednesday on The CW, or tune back in on The Painted Lines for our recap.